Emotional Intelligence: Reasoning before Emotions
It is no cliché that ladies are not only moved by what they hear but also by what they see, spurred by their emotions and feelings. Regardless of how you feel, you should choose to do what is right and not allow your emotions to get the better part of you. Emotions or feelings that cannot be controlled, have power over you. Marriage itself, cannot be managed merely with emotions or feelings.
Quote: If your feelings are not real, your decisions will never be real.
Marriage is a relationship that is easy to embark on and extremely difficult to get out of. It is important to note that, feelings alone cannot sustain a successful marriage and there will be a time when your point of attraction to your spouse disappears and you are left with the decisions and choices to keep your relationship afloat.
To be in a healthy, productive, and positive relationship, your decisions have to be based on facts and not how you feel, because your feelings can betray you but not your credible facts.
When making decisions, the following factors; thoughts, feelings, imaginations, and desires usually have to influence your decision-making process.
A relatable scenario is that of a lady who has just met a new handsome guy, and taken time to brood over him, his looks, and other points of attraction to her. This proceeds to infiltrate her dreams based on the extensive imaginations she had while awake. When awake from the dream, a desire has been created, and this can result in wrong decisions.
This scenario can manifest even in someone’s career path and other areas of life. You may feel wrong and still make the right decisions.
The differentiating factor for adults and children is how they manage their feelings. There is always a trigger to feelings. When you meet someone who understands your love language and the person constantly speaks this to you, feelings begin to develop.
HOW TO MANAGE EMOTIONS
- Self-awareness: Self-awareness is the first quadrant of emotional intelligence. It means knowing who you are. . If you don’t know yourself, you begin to create the wrong definition of yourself. You need to know the kind of feeling you have and be truthful to yourself. If you don’t know who you are, you cannot know who to marry and how to present your value.
- Self-management: This involves managing your feelings, thoughts, and imaginations and also having social awareness. It entails managing and building relationships. Success in life is a combination of relationships. To manage other people, you must be able to manage yourself. To have empathy for others, you must have empathy for yourself.
- Know your God: Knowing God helps you know his nature, in which we were created after. Knowing God comes with the gift of discernment. Knowing what to do at when. God does not expect us to make decisions by emotions, otherwise, he would not have used his son for sacrifice. He will not ask Abraham to sacrifice (his beloved) Isaac. Knowing God, helps you to understand time and seasons.
- Wait upon the Lord: The waiting period is used to prepare you for your destination. "You don’t need to put a ring on your finger to have respect. If you can control what comes out of your mouth, what you put on, and you are professional to the core, you will earn your respect". Don’t jump into conversations, avoid indiscriminate hugging and jumping on all guys. Act with the carriage of a married woman. As a person of value, you don’t go everywhere. There are certain places kings will not go and places queens will not go. You attract your kind. Build your standard even at work, and people will accept it.
- Building your intelligence
- Staying where you have positive mental health.
- Reading books a lot
- Taking care of yourself
- Committing to a cause of social impact.
- Your decisions should not be based on your feelings, it should be based on facts.
- Don’t let your emotions vote
- Put God first
- Know your time
- Wait upon the Lord
Courtesy:
Reasoning before Emotions
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